random.

<----I talked with my sweet Krystal Chan last night. Oh, how I miss that dear girl! So many shared experiences, she understands so much of what my heart is feeling. I wish Canada was closer to Texas! :-) We are planning a trip to Greece, summer of 2011. I was thinking last night about when I was in high school. I would pray consistently for godly friends. Now, I am abundantly blessed with such amazing people who are running hard after Jesus. Thank you, Lord.

This past weekend I took on the project of switching rooms with one of my housemates. The room was bright turquoise, and it definitely needed a new shade. So now my room is a dark plum with a stone rose accent wall. It turned out pretty...I'm just still getting used to having a darker room.

The leaves are finally starting to change colors, which makes me happy. I love how the seasons change...

Dad will be here in 3 weeks! I can't wait to have him around for Thanksgiving. He is going to help me pick out a car,(FINALLY!) and then we are going to drive it to Kansas City to spend turkey day at Claire's house. I am looking forward to just me & dad driving there & back, good quality time. I am so lucky to have such a fun dad! He's probably one of the coolest guys I know. Seriously. :-)

that is all for now...ciao!

Amazing Grace

Lately I've been realizing a lot of things about myself. Some good, but mostly more junk in my life. I think for the first time in a while, the veil has been lifted from over my eyes & I am recognizing a lot of things that need to change. Realizing flaws and areas you need to work on in your spiritual life is usually discouraging, but I actually feel the opposite. Being able to admit where my efforts have failed has totally allowed for Christ to be glorified, and to extend His hand of grace to meet me where I fall short.

I think sometimes honesty can be the problem, especially for us "good Christians", because we are so used to thinking of our lives as before-and-after stories. But the truth is...as I continue this journey of life walking with Jesus, I will fall. And yes, I will still need rescuing.

We cover up all the ugly stuff to protect ourselves, and sometimes the issue runs so deep that we even come to the place where we convince ourselves that this specific sin issue doesn't even exist anymore. And when we do that, we send the message to those who are hurting, who are broken, who are truly weary & heavy laden, that they are not welcome in our churches & our lives.

And when we send that message--even to ourselves--I believe we're actually working against God. Because broken, hurting, & honest people are exactly who God wants in His churches.

Lately my redemption has meant so much more than ever before, remembering how wonderful it is to be saved by a total & completely overwhelming grace. A place warmed by the presence of a father who saw me, knew me, & loved me.

So for whoever might be reading this, I pray that regardless of whatever your struggle might be, that your heart would feel alive and free to fall back on his mercy. We were never meant to rescue ourselves. What a relief!